Humour

gay agenda

Hug a Gay Day – 11th August.

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For some reason some people on the inter-web, especially Facebook, are saying today (August 11) is Hug A Gay day.

Now I am all for hugging gays.  But, no, today isn’t the special day for it.

As I blogged about back in Feb, it’s 2nd Feb, and has been for years.

Oh, while I am on the whole Gay Theme, here’s a very cool page listing the best Effective Signs for gay marriage.  Click on the image below for more

Black and White Version: You can hug gay folk whenever you want.  But today isn’t the official day for it.  You’ll have to wait about 6 months for that.

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Copyright Timothy Allen - No reproduction without permission of

Irony

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Two amazingly ironic news stories today:

Firstly, via NZ Herald: Anti-helmet protest proves fatal for New York motorcyclist

Someone (without a helmet) died protesting for the right not to have a helmet, and yep, the helmet would have saved him.

Secondly, via TVNZ: Woman dies of shock after waking up at funeral

This one is more for the Oh dear how unfortunate file.  A women wakes up in a coffin, and as a result has a heart attack and dies (later).  Apparently they are suing the hospital who declared her dead (who wouldn’t?)

Black and White Version: Sometimes you just cant make this shit up!

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More cool stuff, and oh, I am back!

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I have just got back from a 2 week trip to the US, so I have plenty to blog about in the next week or so, including:

  • A hands on pre-review of the iPad 2 (the cut to the chase black and white version)
  • What’s good (and bad) about the US of A (including tipping!)
  • AirNZ economy service on the new 777-300, and why I think they have missed an opportunity
  • Boeing factory tour in Seattle
  • Why I love San Fran (the black and white)

But before I do that, here are two cool videos that are either going, or are already, viral:

1) Firstly, AirNZ.  They are making up for the (removal of) the gay kiss that wasn’t I think!

 

2) Here’s an awesome video that will bring a tear to your eye.

Black and White Version: There is some very cool stuff out there on the interweb.

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Funny stuff from the interweb

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I do try not to just post random YouTube clubs on my blog, but from time to time some are too good to pass up.

So here’s some of the best I have seen recently:

Baby trashes bar in Las Palmas

And my personal fav, one of the best ever:

Long Stabby Thing

Things are best in threes me thinks, so here’s another we gem.  Less about humour, and more just raw talent. Less than 1,000 view (I think coz the heading isn’t in English), so hardly anyone will have seen this one.

Tirando melodias de canos de PVC

Black and White Version: There sure is some funny shit on the web (pity there is so much crap too!)

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a pride

Hug a Gay Day 2nd Feb 2011

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International Hug a Gay Day

OMG, how did I (almost) miss this one this year!

Yes, 2nd February is once again international hug a gay day (it’s the 4th Annual Hug A Gay day).

Last year I posted about how many were confused about what is was for, and how to hug a gay, so I produced a quick guide.  The full Hug a Gay Day guide is here, and the unwritten rules for Hug a Gay day here, but in a nutshell:

  • Anyone can hug a gay today (best to ask 1st)
  • Gay guys hugging gay guys is OK – but you do that anyway right?   So its more about str8 mates hugging you to show how cool and modern and metro (if they are a guy) they are.
  • Self hugs don’t count (even if you are gay)

The most common question I still get is How long should I hug for? And my reply is that my gay friends said no more than 5 seconds, my straight mates said (on average), around 3.  So let’s say under 4 seconds.  Better still, let’s make it catchy:  Hug for 3, and you’ll be free, hug for 4, and you might get more. (Did that make any sense?  Can you tell I don’t write jingles for a living?)

Oh, and the how to hug video in case you missed it:

Black and White Version: Hug a gay day is back!   Go on do it, I know you want to!

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Click on image for larger version

New earthquake scale to replace richter in Christchurch

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One of the side effects of the recent earthquakes in Christchurch (over 1,000 aftershocks, and at several dozen biggies) that all us Christchurch locals are becoming pseudo self appointed experts on earthquakes.

The problem is however that the more quakes we get, the more it’s apparent the Richter scale is just not cutting it.   The best example was the most recent biggie this morning, which resulted in more FaceBook posts than anything other than the main 7.1 on September 4, but yet only got a 5 on the Richter scale.  However as reported, there was quite some damage, and people got hurt, and it certainly had MAJOR shaking (walls moves 20-30cm) around Christchurch, and power went out.

Even the alternative scale that GeoNet offers (using the MMI scale) doesn’t really cut it for me, coz what I have noticed is, rather obviously, different people respond differently to the same quake, based on a whole range of factors (how far away they are from it, shallow quakes = more violent etc).  So for example, I know the big 7.1 quake didn’t do anything to my office, but a 4.1 knocked stuff of my desk and walls (coz it was so close), so it’s kinda messed up.

So, in an effort to help make the world a bit more black and white (the name of the game for this blog remember?) I have invented a new scale, and with it an all new table.

(more…)

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kiwiblog

Kiwiblog and DPF’s reaction to a dole bludger

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I read KiwiBlog quite a bit, in fact I think it is both my most read blog, and also the 1st NZ based blog I read.

Often DPF (the Author – David Farrar) says lots of stuff I agree with, and while I have occasionally blogged about similar things, especially when the media get lazy and start making stories up, like the sometimes do.  Anyway, this time I actually want to blog about what DPF said, coz it’s just classic (and IMHO a very Paul Henry moment (where someone says what everyone else is thinking).

The background:

The Dominion Post runs a story about how Creative NZ and Wellington City Council jointly funded an unemployed guy to $40,000 to promote the virtues of being unemployed:

Tao Wells, 37, advocates the opportunities and benefits of unemployment and says it is unfair that long-term beneficiaries are labelled bludgers for exploiting the welfare system.

The reaction:

Laughable (and sad at the same time) eh?  Well it was DPF’s reaction that was even funnier (and SOOOO spot on).

It’s unfair that I have to work 60 hour weeks to fund your fucking life style, you bludging wanker.

But it gets better.  The Dominion Post reported the guy’s dole was cut:

Late yesterday afternoon his benefit was cut off after Work and Income learned of the project.

And was quoted saying

Wells denied his pro-unemployment stance was hypocritical when he was being paid $2000 for the project. “We should never be forced to take a job. If you’re forced to take a job it’s a punishment. If a job’s a punishment then society must be a prison.”

To which DPF replied:

Listen Mr Fuckwit, you are not forced to take a job. So long as you don’t want those of us who do work to pay you a benefit, you do not need to ever work again.

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Black and White Version: The unemployed shouldn’t be forced to do anything.  But to get a payment from the taxpayer, they can, and should.  To paraphrase DPF “Get a job fuckwit”.

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Earthquake

New Earthquake office game in Christchurch

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The Earthquake Office Game

Since there are now at least 4-5 decent earthquakes a day in Christchurch at the moment (and I have to say a few people are not coping to well with this) here’s the new office game we can all play.  It helps reduce stress and make each quake a mini game.  Yes, kids can play too.

Rules

When there is an earth quake, you must in 30 seconds estimate:

  • The magnitude on the richter scale (e.g. “that was a 4.2″)
  • The depth (e.g. “that was was 8km deep”)
  • The location (e.g “Ummmm .. 30km North West of Christchurch”)

Then .. check your answers on www.geonet.org.nz (normally updates with 10-15 minutes).  To be sure, accurately mark the time of the quake when it happens, in case there is a couple close to one another.

How to Score

Magnitude: Spot on = 5 points, take one point off for every 0.1 out (so 0.3 out means 5-3=2 points.  Anything 0.5 out or more gets zero)

Depth: Spot on = 5 points.  Take one point off for every km out (so out by 4km means 5-4 = 1 point.  Anything more than 5km out gets zero).

Location: Spot on = 5 points.  Take one point off for every 3 km out distance wise.  This one is slightly trickier since people will report things from different locations (eg “10km North West of Christchurch” or “30km North of Darfield’ might be the same place).  So to be fair best everyone agrees on a reference point (like Christchurch), since GeoNet will report relative to there if you click on the link next to “Details” of the quake’s location.  Remember “10km east” is actually 15 km away from “5km west”.   To keep it simple if its’ 10km NorthWest you could be strict and draw it on a map, or just agree between everyone in the office how you count these.

PS: -10 points if you false call an earthquake (e.g. a truck goes past).

Black and White Version: Office Earthquake – a game we can all play!

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IPLUNGE PHONE STAND

Best and funniest iPhone 4 and Apple videos on the web

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I was browsing, stumbling around and otherwise looking around the web today and came across a whole bunch of cool (aka funny) videos on iPhones, Mac, Apple etc, so thought i would share them here:

The Unofficial iPhone 4 Launch Video

Warning: Contains sexual references :-)

The iPhone 4 Apology Video (including the black guy)

There there are the I’m on Boat Parodys

In case you missed I’m on a Boat – watch this first, if not, skip to the next one.  Warning: Harsh language.

Then watch this ..

While on the topic of cool, check out this novel, retro stand for an iPhone/iPad (and cheap 2, only $US 5.99).  Click on the image for more details.

Black and White Version: Some people have too much time on their hands, glad they do, they come up with funny shit :-)

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Grindr, gay men, sex and the NZ Herald

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For those that don’t know, Grindr is an iPhone (and now Blackberry) application that uses location based search (i.e. it knows where you are) to tell you where other people using the same application are.  It has a simple image of each person (a photo you pick) and a short profile and basic stats (height, weight, age etc).   For anyone reading this, it’s easy to see that this is used by gay guys wanting to hook up ({f you don’t know what I mean by this check out this meaninglook for Slang Meaning 3(b) }.

Anyway, I have done a wee review of Grindr before, but had to laugh when the NZ Herald had this article today on Grindr. The headline was Gay men embrace GPS dates. That headline is quite wrong on a few levels:

  1. Grindr isn’t always GPS based – it’s LOCATION based.  An iPhone 2G uses cell phone triangulation to work out where it is.  But that’s a minor issue.
  2. How does one put this nicely?  Ummmm, Grindr is NOT about dates, it’s about HOOK UPs.  Cute that they say GPS dates, but yeah, no, not really.

It also quotes former Gay New Zealand editor Matt Akersten:

“You might not be in the traditionally gay areas like Ponsonby or Grey Lynn or the inner city – you could be in one of the smaller centres – and you just plug it in and realise you’re not alone, and there are other people like you out there, it’s a great networking tool,” he said.

Euphemisms are so cute..  It’s a great networking tool. Well if by networking you mean HOOK UP then sure, it is.

On a more serious level, Grindr works best in big cities with lots of users – like Sydney or bigger.  But when you go to Oamaru and you are the only person on it, it kinda falls down.   As they say, I am the only gay in the village. There is one downside of the super large cities: Since Grindr only lists a few pages (100 I think) of the closest people, in places like Sydney there might be 100 people within a few km, meaning you only see those people and not people further out.  In places like Auckland you see everyone (coz there are often only a few dozen online withing 10-20km at any given time).  Also as I have blogged previously, the application has to be running to work (no background push services unless you want to pay a monthly fee), so it kills the battery super quick.

That’s all.  Not a major issue, in fact it’s kinda nice that the media don’t write the headline Gay Mean use technology to have more sex, coz that would be true.  Mind you it would be true of MEN generally, not just gay men.

And fear not, new versions are coming:

A version of Grindr for lesbians and heterosexuals is expected by the end of the year.

Black and White Version: It’s nice to see a misleading headline (and story) that’s actually written more positively that the potential underlying story.

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